So, Part 1 was getting way too long to read and my attention span is akin to that of a dwarf on ritalin SO, here is Part 2 of “Which Musikfest Platz is Right for You?
Again, . For a list of ALL venues and schedules, go here.
You can download the map of the whole musikfest party thing event here.
1. Festplatz (AKA Polkaplatz)
Located: Beneath the 378 spur Bridge or whatever it’s called.
Who plays there: I don’t know why this isn’t just called “Polkaplatz.” Whenever anyone tells me to meet them at “Festplatz” I’m like, “Where is that?” Then they say “The Polka Tent” and I’m like “OH SNAP!”
Whoever says that they don’t enjoy or won’t listen to polka, shutyamouths. This is the one time of the year I will listen to and dance to such music and that is just how it’s going to be. Besides, it’s Musikfest, let your hair down, shake off the dust, get out there and cut a rug with granny. They do have more music than just Polka, but your best bet is The Fabulous Greaseband on Thursday, Aug. 12.
Who goes there: EVERYONE IN THE UNIVERSE! (old people)
Pros: Oh c’mon, have some fun and go to Polkaplatz Festplatz no one is going to judge you. Besides, they have places to sit and eat your yummy foods and no one is going to tell on your for enjoying it.
Cons: Old people move VERY SLOWLY. So, just be ready for that.
2. Plaza Tropical
Located: In the grassy area where the Celtic guys throw telephone poles at Celtic Fest.
Who plays there: ”World” music bands, which is the American way of saying “Ethnic music.” It’s a lot of fun bands that represent the diversity of the area. So, if you’re down for some of that music that you hear blasting from the cars on the south side all the time, this is your bet. (I have to admit I always wanna dance when one of those tinted cars goes by with those infections Caribbean beats.)
THEY DO have other acts too, a lot of fun surfy type music. This is the platz to go to if you want to soak up the sun. I recommend Davey and the Waverunners on Aug. 12.
Who goes there: Drunk people who are like “how did we just wander into this?” Ha, more people go here at night than during the day because it has a better “outdoor concert feel” than some of the other platzes because it’s on an elevated stage and you feel like you should be dancing.
Pros: As I just said, it’s got more of a real outdoor concert feel to it. Definitely unique.
Cons: For being out in the open it’s kinda hard to remember it’s there since vendors block the view somewhat from the street and there isn’t one “main” entrance to it.
2. Banana Island
Located: Not on an island as the name would lead you to believe, but in a parking lot across from Plaza Tropical.
Who plays there: THIS is the place to find some interesting music. Two summers ago a group of friends and I stumbled down there only to find some stunningly impressive pianist. I forget her name (stupid) but, she was incredible and there was no way that I ever would have found here unless we just happened to be there. So, I recommend checking this gem out (the stage is at the end of the “island”).
I recommend Bill Warfield Octet on Friday, Aug. 13
Who goes there: People who wandered through the rest of Musikfest and wanted to see what was across the street.
Pros: They have kids games there, including go karts. I convinced the worker there the other year to let me ride and he was like “Don’t be mean to the kids.” So, I wasn’t, but then, after I was about to smoke all those 7 year olds some kid totally runs me into the tires and almost wrecks me Kyle Busch style and I was like WTF MATE?
Cons: A bit off the beaten path? I dunno, it’s fun and there is food there and a beer tent that doesn’t usually get super mobbed.
3. Americaplatz
Located: Where Johnny Casino works, at the plaza at City Hall and the Library.
Who plays there: Rock bands yo! I actually think this is most underrated section of Musikfest. Some people don’t even know it’s there. C’mon peeps.
I recommend The Dirty Guv’nahs on Saturday, Aug. 7
Who goes there: People who are smart enough to know that Americaplatz is there. They have some great food as well. Walk up the Church Street, idiots.
Pros: Great music with a full stage and plenty of seating. Great food. Usually not a ton of long lines.
Cons: Where is it? Ha. It is a bit of a hike, but you’re already drunk, what the fuck do you care?
4. Main Street
Located: Main Street in Bethlehem. I’m not even linking to this. Don’t be an idiot.
Who plays there: Different types of bands who play in tiny sections along the street between vendors AND the PAN FLUTERS WHO WILL STEAL YOUR GIRLFRIENDS!!!!
Who goes there: Everyone who comes to Musikfest.
Pros: You kinda can’t miss it.
Cons: Ugh. So many kids who are getting ready for their late summer pregnancy scares. They should just get a paddock for these weirdos.
There you have it. Now, you know where to go. You don’t even need a map. Just memorize all of this.
AND DON’T FORGET TO COME TO LVWITHLOVE PLATZ ON FRIDAY, AUG. 6 at 7 p.m. FOR A SUPER AWESOME SHOW!