Man Assaults Woman with Car Battery

And here I was thinking that the lady who threw a lit sock at her gasoline doused boyfriend would be the weirdest thing thrown at a person all day.

Last year, I took my car into a local Midas to get an oil change before I took a trip to South Carolina. It was totally driving fine, no problems, blah blah. They take it in, change the oil, bring it out and BOOM battery is dead.

I’m like, “Uh, this battery just HAPPENED to die from the time I gave it to you and you brought it out?”

I mean that COULD happen, sure, but it was pretty suspicious.

Moral of the story? Never get your oil changed. 

Philip Arnold, of Bethlehem, allegedly punched Mikaela Shelly in the face at 6:21 a.m. Sunday, pulled her hair and tossed a car battery at her, causing cuts and scratches to her lower legs, according to court records. SOURCE: The Morning Call

A car jack or tire iron, or a combination of the two, would probably have done more damage.

Or one of those ice scrapers with the mittens built into them. 

Who invented that because = genius.

Also, talk about Assault AND BATTERY!!!!!

BOOOM.

I’m here all week.