Bethlehem Trash Hauler Solution? HIGHLANDER DEMOLITION DERBY!

Bethlehem is kind of unique in that each resident or landlord can contract with one of many trash haulers of their choosing, instead of having just one that serves the entire city.

This can result in more competitive prices, but it means that different houses have trash out on different days. The city thinks that having one trash hauler can benefit the city as a whole. The independent trash haulers, of course, think this is a bad idea since it will hurt their business should their bid not be picked by the city.

I’m pretty ambivalent to the whole purpose, to be honest. So, I can only suggest one solution…

Now Bethlehem is considering hiring a private company to collect residents’ trash and then bill like it already does for recycling. The city is seeking proposals until Nov. 2 and a pre-proposal meeting is scheduled for Oct. 18, according to a legal notice.

Residents remain divided on the wisdom of such a system; leading to spirited debates each time the city re-examines the issue.

City spokesman Joe Kelly said officials want to evaluate the costs and see if city collection is more efficient. Palmer Township just negotiated a new Waste Management contract that dropped a resident’s annual cost from $309 to $280, Kelly noted.

The city last looked at the idea about two years ago due to resident complaints about garbage piling up in the city’s denser residential areas, Kelly said. It’s tough for the city to know what hauler is leaving trash behind.

“Trash is on city streets virtually every day of the week,” Kelly said. SOURCE: The Express-Times

The solution? A trash hauler demolition derby held in the Martin Tower parking lot.

These trash haulers should have at least ONE vehicle they can throw into the demolition derby. They can get their buddies to paint it up all totally awesome and intimidating.

As with any other demolition derby, the haulers will line up their trucks on opposite ends of the parking lot and then Kathy Craine will get them started by dropping the checkered flag.

The trash haulers will prove to the city which one of them is the most worthy by utterly destroying their competition with their garbage truck of doom.

Then, they will have to haul away the dead garbage truck carcasses of their competitors.

Trash Hauler Highlander!

THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!

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