Pennsylvania Turnpike to Go Cash Free (ALL EZPASS ALL THE TIME!)

Before I could drive, I heard Adam Sandler’s “Toll Booth Willie” sketch from some older kid who had it. Oh, we all laughed at how ole Toll Booth Willie was such a crazzzzzy dude.

The talking goat sketch on that Sandler album was the best, though.

Side note here if you enjoyed Adam Sandler in your youth and loved him on SNL. Just think, the way that you viewed how your parents enjoyed Steve Martin’s King Tut sketch is the way kids now view how you enjolyed Adam Sandler’s Red Hooded Sweatshirt bit. Let that wrap around your noggin’ for a bit.

Anyway, the Turnpike is gonna go digital. What if you don’t want EZPass, you say? Well, they’ll just take a pic of your license plate and mail you a bill.

In what it’s calling one of the most ambitious efforts in the nation, the Pennsylvania Turnpike Commission plans to convert to all-electronic tolling within five years, scrapping the need for drivers to pass through tollbooths.

Toll plazas along the more than 300-mile mainline Turnpike and its spurs, including the Northeast Extension, would be replaced by overhead gantries that would deduct tolls from E-ZPass users, acting commission CEO Craig Shuey said Tuesday.

License plates of vehicles without transponders would be photographed and toll bills would be sent to owners. SOURCE: The Morning Call

So, as soon as this happens, ask to borrow your ex girlfriend’s car and tell her you need it to, I dunno, take your grandmother to her bridge game or something. Then just drive through the tolls about 15 times and wait a month for hilarity to ensue.

Because, it will ensue.