SUV Crashes Through Bird Store

If you haven’t seen “Birdemic,” I recommend doing so. It’s on Netflix. It’s possibly the worst movie in the history of movies. The special effects from Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds” actually OUT DO IT. Which is actually really sad since the people made “Birdemic” think they are pretty awesome. And “The Birds” was released in 1963.

They are not.

They are lunatics.

Seriously, watch this movie and report back to mean.

Meanwhile, on the other side of town…

A vehicle crashed through the front of the Bird Mania store in Salisbury Township about 9:30 a.m. Tuesday.

No serious injuries were reported, but details were not immediately available.

The vehicle was a KIA sport-utility-vehicle with had a handicapped license plate from Pennsylvania. The vehicle was completely inside the store, which is located at 3235 W. Emmaus Ave., when police arrived.SOURCE: The Morning Call

You know in your head you imagined about a bazillion feathers exploding out of the store when it was hit.

Because that’s probably what actually happened.

I like how they point out the SUV had a handicapped license plate, because, you know, it would make sense that someone who was driving with a handicapped plate would be more inclined to bust into a bird store because they are handicapped and we’re not actually making fun of handicapped people’s driving, we’re just pointing it out because we’re journalists.

So slick.

I had a bird named “Crispy” in high school. The dog ate it.