Handcuffed AWOL Marine Jumps Into River to Try to Escape Cops (FACEBOOK PROFILE)

Our Celtic Classic Photo Scavenger Hunt selected photo album is getting quite big and … quite awesome. Check it out! We’ll be contacting winners early next week.

Now, onto some super fun wtf news! I am lucky enough to know a few Marines and I’m sure they wouldn’t want to have this guy grouped into their selective crowd.

Also, jumping into a river in the fall while handcuffed may not be the best idea ever, no matter your level of training.

Authorities in eastern Pennsylvania say a handcuffed man assaulted a police chief, escaped custody and jumped into a river, traveling about a mile before being recaptured.

Lehighton police say the wild chase started Monday while 18-year-old Luke Zetts (FACEBOOK PROFILE) was being led to a cruiser. He had been arrested on a charge of being AWOL from the Marines Corps.

Authorities say Zetts got behind the chief and choked him while still handcuffed. A struggle ensued, and police say Zetts ran off and jumped into the Lehigh River.

Officers say Zetts floated for about 20 minutes before being re-arrested in his hometown of Weissport.SOURCE: The Morning Call

Yowsers. He sounds like an upstanding young man!

But, seriously, he’s lucky he survived the river that long. While it’s not super cold out just yet, it’s not exactly the easiest to swim with your hands clasped together. It’s like super doggy paddling. 

Oh, yeah, and that’s a picture he drew. Apply yourself, people. You coulda beeen sombahhhdy.