$10,000 in Wedding Gifts Stolen From Wedding Reception

Weddings are great, if you’re getting married at said wedding. You get a ton of free stuff and your new wife’s rich dad gets to pay for everyone to get drunk.

That’s how it works, right? As a guy I always figured, whatever, either 1. her family is paying for it because they are the ones who want all this pomp and circumstance or 2. if that doesn’t apply, we’re totally getting married by the Mayor of Bethlehem on a barge in the middle of the Lehigh River with monkeys playing the banjo.

Either way, I win.

And, if we do get gifts (bring gifts) I’m going to make sure I put my friends who get easily angered in charge of watching them.

All of the gifts brought to a couple’s Springfield Township wedding reception Saturday night were stolen soon after the event ended, according to the couple.

About $10,000 worth of gifts, including cash, wine and spirits, were taken from Jason and Amy Wright of Pipersville after their reception at a friend’s farm along California Road.

“It’s such a nightmare,” Amy Wright said Monday. “This is so emotional for everybody. Who would do this?”

The gifts had been gathered in two tents set up for the reception for more than 100 friends and relatives outside the host’s house. Wright said the theft wasn’t discovered until 7:30 a.m. Sunday, five and a half hours after the party broke up. SOURCE: The Morning Call

I feel bad for these people, I really do. They probably felt no need to lock up these presents because they were among friends. But, I’m not sure about you, but if I had $10,000 of anything anywhere I would make sure there was some sort of contingency plan to keep it safe. 

I mean, that’s $10K! You just leave it sitting out all night? Was this some sort of honor system test?

Simple solution, though. They should just divorce and get remarried! That way, everyone is obligated to give them presents again.

Right?

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