May 2012
62 posts
6 tags
Wilson Man Hits Son Over Head with Plastic Patio...
You know it’s getting closer summer when the patio furniture is outside and Joe’s Tavern has their fancy outside seating set up.
You also know it’s getting closer to summer when people start doing ridiculous things in public.
A 34-year-old man Wilson Borough man is accused of hitting his son in the head Thursday night with a white plastic patio chair. Police were called at...
8 tags
Man Attacks Neighbor with Machete, then Shoots...
If you have off of work today, you’re a jerk.
Three day weekends, or, in your case, four day weekends, are the best thing ever.
You wake up on Sunday and you go, “Hey, we get to play Saturday all over again!”
It’s almost as good as Good Friday.
And, while I don’t enjoy running stories about people getting dead, this… this was… interesting.
A man...
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Lehigh Valley Missed Connections of the Week (Gay...
Lehigh Valley Missed Connections of the Week brought to you by Townsend Insurance Agency, RMC Tech Mobile Repair, and Molly’s Irish Grille & Sports Pub!
If you haven’t watched the premiere episode of Lehigh Valley with Love Live, I’m embedding the hell out of it so you now must watch it.
Other than that? Come to Artsquests on Sunday night at 8 p.m. with us and watch the...
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Dump Truck Runs into Hellertown Fire Station,...
So.. yeah. Breaking news really isn’t our thing, but, it’s not every day that a dump truck runs into a fire station and explodes into flames…
Leithsville Volunteer Fire Company’s station near Hellertown went up in flames Thursday after a dump truck hauling asphalt crashed into the building and exploded, with the driver barely escaping, according to witnesses and emergency...
9 tags
Horse Gets Trapped in In-Ground Pool Cover
Pools are awesome, especially if you have your own personal one. Then, you can pee in it whenever you want and no one is going to judge you.
Well, if you have friends over and they are in the pool with you when you pee, they will probably judge you and get pretty mad since now they are swimming in pool water that has pee in it. But, the point, really, is that you can do whatever you want in it.
...
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Deadbeat Dad Tricked Into Returning to Lehigh...
There’s something satisfying in tricking someone into justice.
For example, I watched some TV show recently where a police department somewhere sent out fake letters to people who had active warrants telling them that they had won a laptop. The letters said, “Hey, come claim your laptop at this church or something.” And, when the people showed up, BOOM HANDCUFFS!
It’s...
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Man Deliberately Hits Man On Sidewalk With Car,...
Outside of Camden or Detroit, there aren’t many worse places to deliberately run someone over with your car and not expect some sort of retaliation.
“What are they gonna do, throw a rock at my windshield?” the silly layman asks.
No, shoot guns at you.
An Allentown man was shot Wednesday after the driver of a car in which he was riding deliberately struck another man on a city...
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Lehigh Valley with Love Live! Premiere Episode!
Lehigh Valley with Love Live is live!
We hope you enjoy our first episode enough that you’ll like it and share it on Facebook or Youtube or Twitter or via carrier pigeon or light rail.
The more fan support we receive, the better chance that we can make this into a show I will be able to get Ed Hanna on as a guest.
Thank you to Lehigh Valley Mirror for filming, editing, producing and...
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If the Arena Doesn't Happen. What Should Go In Its...
Unless you’re living under the 8th Street Bridge, and maybe even if you are, you’ve been hearing about the Allentown Arena project and how lawsuits are bringing construction to a halt.
The townships suing don’t want Allentown to use their earned income tax monies and, although Allentown offered them a settlement where they’d recoup their money, it seems to be a bit too...
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Easton Plans to Go Both Ways with Centre Square...
I’m no civil engineer, but traffic circles are the worst thing you can encounter, design wise, on a street.
I take that back, New Jersey jug handles are the ABSOLUTE worst, but traffic circles are a close second.
And, it’s not because their design isn’t good. It’s because people get to a traffic circle and go, “HOLY CRAP A TRAFFIC CIRCLE WTF DO I DO?”
...
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LVwithLOVE Live Premieres Tomorrow!
Lehigh Valley with Love Live is a new five minute webisode produced by Lehigh Valley Mirror and premiering tomorrow!
What is it? Well, we are taking the best three news stories of the previous week and talking about them as usual, but, on camera.
So, it’s all the stuff that you’re used to, except this time you don’t have to read!
We’re really excited and want to thank...
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Man Reenacts Scene from "The Avengers" During Wawa...
It’s always good to make friend with at least one big guy, even if you don’t like him that much. Big guys are great because they totally have your back at bars when you’re acting like an idiot and some guy wants to punch you in the face. Then, you’re like, “Oh yeahda? Wellz, take that up awith my buddsi, Igor over therz.”
However, if your big guy is bigger than...
5 tags
Casino Money Funds Casino Treatment Program
While this is obviously a good thing, it is also a bit..interesting.
Using casino monies to fund gambling treatment is kinda like using bar proceeds to fund alcoholism treatment.
At the end of the day, this is a positive prgram. People with gambling problems will be able to get treatment that they need.
But, it also makes you think of the bigger picture.
Northampton County will receive nearly...
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Woman Tries to Avoid Cat with SUV, Hits Pole, Gets...
House cats in houses are great animals.
House cats on the street are vermin!
The problem with any animal you encounter on the road while you’re driving, drunk or not, is your first instinct isn’t to barrel through them.
Nine times out of ten, you should barrel through them because as cute as this cat, or a raccoon, or stupid squirrel may look, it’s not worth totaling your car...
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Easton Cops Kill Black Bear, Everyone's Mad...
Easton Police killed the black bear that 911 operators told residents not to bother them about.
They said the kill was made after several attempts to tranquilize the animal.
And, they said that they did so to ensure the safety of the community.
These are valid points, but, do deserve to be questioned.
Easton police shot and killed a black bear late Saturday night in a wooded area off North...
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Lehigh Valley Families Can't Find Babysitters?...
Why parents would entrust some stupid teenager to watch the baby they created is beyond me.
I mean, maybe in the 1980s or something, when there were less distractions. But, now with all the tweetering and Faceplacing, teenagers are just so distracted and connected.
All they are going to do is party at your house and have premarital sex while your bundle of joy is upstairs probably suffocating...
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Win Tickets to Artsquest's "Best of Craigslist"...
Update!: And our winner is Matt Winter! Matt, we’ll contact you to get your info. Thanks for playing and see you at “Best of Craigslist” this Sunday!
If you dig our Lehigh Valley Missed Connections each week, what could be more fun than seeing similar Craigslist ads performed live!? On stage live! In front of people live!
It’s true, and you can win two tickets to this...
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Man Arrested for Being Drunk on Bicycle
It’s not clear if this guy will be arrested with a DUI or not, but, the point is that he can be.
In fact, I think the stipulation for being arrested for a DUI is that you’re over the legal limit and operating a vehicle that needs you to control it.
So, basically, you could get arrested for a DUI if you drunkenly rode your big wheel down 378. Well, you’d also be arrested for...
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Grizzly Bear in Easton? 911 says, "Don't Call Us"
If you see a grizzly bear in Easton, don’t call 911, they don’t want to hear it.
I’m serious.
911 operators said calling to report the sighting of arguably one of the most dangerous animals in North America inappropriate.
A “grizzly bear” was reported walking the streets of Easton on Friday night, but police were unable to find it.
A woman told emergency...
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Allentown Daycare Doubled as Cocaine Packaging...
It’s Friday, so my wit-o-meter is running low.
I guess I could talk about how kids could mistake cocaine for sugar, resulting in a super romper room.
Or, I could talk about how I miss Fun Dip. But, then I’d be like, “Do I really miss Fun Dip?”
Fun Dip seems like something you’d miss, but, in reality, it kinda sucked. That sugar pole or whatever they gave you...
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Man Rides with Child on Lawnmower and They Tip...
What better vehicle to take your child on than one that has spinning blades on the bottom of it?
No, seriously, is there a more dangerous vehicle you could take your kid on? Sure, an ATV goes faster, but at least it doesn’t have the equivalent of ten steak knives under its belly.
WTF?
A Lehigh Township man and a child were injured Thursday evening when the rider mower they were on fell...
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Lehigh Valley Missed Connections of the Week...
Lehigh Valley Missed Connections of the Week brought to you by Townsend Insurance Agency, R.M.C. Tech, and Molly’s Irish Grille & Sports Pub!
Where I grew up, they had this thing called the “Bike Hike” where you’d get people to sponsor you and then you’d go ride a bicycle or something. I guess it seemed like a fun thing to do, but, at the time, it just seemed as though...
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Allentown Man Shoots at Bicyclist Who Brushed by...
An update to this story from Mcall.com..
Bethlehem bicyclists may be pretty upset about the whole Fahy Bridge situation, including some motorists just not giving a damn that they are on the road, but they’ve got nothing on Allentown.
In Allentown, if you even brush by someone on your Huffy, you better hope your bicycle shorts of made of Kevlar.
A man walking across the Hamilton Street...
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Man Tries to Run Down Wife in Wegman's Parking Lot...
Nothing like trying to kill your estranged wife with your car after the two of you meet to discuss the care of your four-year-old daughter.
I mean, it really sets the tone for how said daughter is going to be able to see how grown adults can handle problems in a civilized way, paving the path for her to become a well-adjusted adult who doesn’t solve her problems through violence or...
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Bethlehem Dentist Practices Without License for...
I had braces for a bit when I was a kid and the Saturdays I’d have to go to Dr. Tweedle’s office and get those suckers tightened still resonates in my childhood memory banks as the absolute worst pain I can remember.
It’s awful. It’s like having 20 vices in your mouth at once. I honestly think that orthodontists get into the field, at least a little bit, because they are...
9 tags
Pen Argyl High School Is Nerdiest Lehigh Valley...
As much as I want to say something snarky about the kids who compete in Scholastic Scrimmage, I can’t. I think that stuff is fun as crap. The questions are difficult and even though I’m a wealth of information no one ever, ever, ever needs, I really don’t think I’d fare very well on any of the school’s teams that participate.
I’d just be there for moral support...
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Woman Points Gun at Newspaper Delivery Man, Fires...
Delivering newspapers is a thankless job, I’m sure. You’re up at some ungodly hour and all people do is say how you threw their paper in the bushes.
Then again, you probably did. But, what do you care? You can just say you put it right on the front porch where it belonged.
Unless some crazy lady comes up and starts screaming at you and pulling out handguns!
Allentown police said...
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Woman Steals Strip Club Tip Jar
If you run out of $1s at the strip club, the logical move is to hit up the ATM and take out a few $20s and then head to the bar to get a drink so you can break those $20s and… phew that’s a lot of work, just steal the tip jar.
A drunk woman stole a restroom attendant’s tip jar Friday morning from Platinum Plus strip club, 1245 Airport Road in Allentown. Sonia R. Caraballo, 22,...
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Man Rear Ends Car, Somehow Drives Away With...
Remember the whole “magic bullet” JFK assassination theory? No, not the one that can make omlettes in 30 seconds. The one where it was theorized that only one bullet caused the all the Texas Gov’s wounds and JFK’s non-fatal ones. Whatever, you remember the Seinfeld episode.
It’s probably as quizzical an explanation to some as to how this guy rear ended a car and...
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Sponsor Shout Out! Townsend Insurance Agency
Any insurance agency that is going to get on board with Lehigh Valley with Love better know their stuff. That’s why we’ve recently partnered with Townsend Insurance Agency who totally knows their stuff!
Give them a big welcome and hit them up on their Facebook page or visit the Townsend Insurance Agency website for more information.
I’m sure many of the people profiled on this...
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Naked Easton Man Walks Around Apartment Complex,...
I love walking around downtown in the spring time when the weather is all happy and storefronts are full of stuff you can buy and puppies are bounding about in crosswalks that cars actually stop it.
It’s a great time. Doing it naked would probably be liberating, however, I am just not at the level of comfort this man is in the public buff.
An Easton man walking around an apartment complex...
6 tags
New Jersey Man Arrested for DUI Four Times in Five...
Mistakes happen. Mistakes don’t happen in rapid succession because then they are called “habits.”
And, I know the question is going to be “How is this guy able to drive after he got arrested three times?” etc., but the real question is… holy hell how is he not in jail NOW? The guy swerved around a school bus for chrissakes!
Authorities have arrested a New...
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Man Gets Ride Home at 4 a.m., Is Surprisingly...
If you’re out and about at 4 a.m. you’re either heading to a very early starting job, you’re up for a ridiculously early run, or your walking the shame out of your shoes.
I’m kinda thinking this guy was doing the latter considering he thought it’d be a grand idea to hop into a car with three other people who would “give him a ride home” only to be...
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Man Walks Out of Hotel Bethlehem Without Shoes,...
Now, before anyone starts going “Hey, it’s not illegal to walk outside with no shoes on,” I think we should make it clear that this guy was drunk enough they had to take him to the hospital. So, maybe the no shoes were the tip off, but the coup de gras was him not knowing he had feet.
A 24-year-old wedding guest faces public drunkenness charges after police say he was spotted...
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Truck Spills Used Cooking Oil on Highway; Man Gets...
Nothing good happens after midnight, right?
Well, I’m sure a ton of good things happen after midnight, wink wink nudge nudge, but the premise of the point is that if someone’s up and about at that time they aren’t doing it for the benefit of mankind at large.
So, after midnight when you’re letting it all hang out, you should also not draw any sort of attention to yourself...
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Someone Tried to Blow Up Hellertown?
Hellertown isn’t so awful. It really isn’t. It’s almost bucolic. Almost. Ok, maybe like one or two streets. There isn’t a lot of crime. There is a decent downtown and they have those Lost River Caverns and stuff.
The only reason it may get a bad rap is because the cops are power hungry and some of the local yokels tend to be a bit….. well they may wear a lot of white...
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Man Throws Pitchfork at Boy then Dumps Beer on Him
It’s official, this is your last story of the week. There is no possible way that ANYTHING can outdo this between now and 5 p.m., no way.
When’s the last time you got so wasted you decided to ruin someone’s entire childhood?
There’s no way this kid isn’t walking away not only terrified of the world, but also beer and farming tools.
This doesn’t even really...
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Rabid Fox Captured and Killed in Allentown (Also,...
I’m not sure if I’ve ever told you the story of when my friend was chased by a rabid cow through the woods.
It’s true and it starts with his dad asking him to go wrangle up the cattle in the back yard. Well, he comes across one cow that’s all loopey faced and frothing at the mouth. The cow starts rubbing up on him, so he starts to run. The cow is all googly eyed and...
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Lehigh Valley Missed Connections of the Week
Lehigh Valley Missed Connections of the Week brought to you by Townsend Insurance Agency, R.M.C. Tech, and Molly’s Irish Grille & Sports Pub!
Ahh, it’s the weekend. I have really nothing that witty to say other than, “Hey, read these weird missed connections from local weirdos.”
Have a sweet weekend, kiddos.
You said I was Beautiful - w4m - 39 (Allentown)
Date:...
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High School Students Get First Taste of How The...
Remember when you were in high school and your teachers looked at you, with their mortgages and student loan debts in their eyes, and said, “These are the best days of your lives, don’t ruin them by being an idiot”?
Then, remember in college when you were like, “WOW, these ARE THE BEST DAYS OF MY LIFEEEEE”! And then you were like, “YESSSSS I have a job...
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Man Hides Car Parts in Car Door, Bulge Gives Him...
I have to give this guy an “A” for effort and stupidity.
I mean, sure, if you’re going to try and steal a bunch of car parts, what better place than to put them in the car door you’re buying? The person selling them wouldn’t ever think anyone would be that brazen!
But, greed wins out again. He just had to stuff them a bit TOO thick.
The car door that Winston A....
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Woman Shows CVS Manager Her Boobs, Asks To Be...
There have to be a ton of jobs where you encounter the crazies of the world on a regular basis.
The kind of job where you’re interacting with the “off the street” public at large.
1. Bartender
2. Stripper
3. Worker at any department / convenience store
For the most part, crazy people are allowed in the establishments where these people work without much clearance. So, if...
6 tags
Baby Bear in South Easton Chased by Young People...
Bears are like the hippopotomauses of America. Sure, you could say lions, but, I’ve seen enough Animal Planet to know that hippos are insane and will fart in lions’ faces and taunt them before evicting them from their African plain and eating their children.
Hippos are DIIIIICKS. So, yeah, I’d rather be referred to as a hippo than a lion. Being the hippo of America means...
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Lehigh County Uses Aerial Photos to See If You...
Laws are laws and rules are rules and I get a lot of them and as much as they suck sometimes you just have to follow the rules in order for society to be the best it can be.
That being said, there are some laws and ordinances that are fine to at least bitch about, if not totally ignore. Such as, in most municipalities, when you build something onto your home you need a permit. Why? Well,...
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Man Picks Up Lost Wallet, Doesn't Try to Find...
I remember watching a Nightline or Dateline special one night where they placed a wallet on the ground in some city and then trained a camera on it. Anyone who picked it up and looked for the owner or called them was a hero. Anyone who didn’t was a jerk.
And, to be honest, without any real philosophical dissection; it’s the truth. Just give someone’s crap back if it isn’t...
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Man Follows Too Closely, Ruins Perfectly Fine Geo...
Two things here:
1. There’s nothing wrong with a Geo Metro. In fact, they are so awful that I think they should be anointed with Hipster cool cred. There’s no reason why not.
They are less pretentious than those stupid Smart Cars (see what I did there?). And they remind me of a simpler time when people purchased brand new Geo Metros and somehow drove them off the car lot while...
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Truck With 1,800 Cases of Corona Stolen From...
I’m not a beer snob. I enjoy good tasty beer and I enjoy cheap ass get you drunk beer. Why? Because I’m a pragmatist and sometimes crappy beer is where it’s at. Some nights great beer is where it’s at.
When you paint yourself into the corner of only drinking the finest blah blah blah then you can never enjoy the awful taste of a Natty Ice on a sunny Saturday picnic in the...
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Allentown Boy Steals Condoms and Yu-Gi-Oh! Cards
I know what Pokemon is and what Pogs were. I know what Hypercolor is and what a Justin Bieber is. And, while I like to think I’m on the up-and-up with pop culture, while I had heard the word “Yu-Gi-Oh!” before, the only thing that I could put it with in my brain was a weird Japanese drawing.
(Weird quick and true story: A girl I knew in college walked in on her weird roommate...
7 tags
Easton Woman Beats Husband With Vacuum Pole...
I may not have gotten the best of the best lots in life, but I was given a good gene for facial hair.
I can pretty much do whatever I please with it. And, although I’ve not tried the handlebar mustache, it’s on my list.
Before I embark on this endeavor, however, I may want to check that it’s something that won’t get me beaten with a cleaning device part.
An Easton woman...